Me First!

The joke political party just for me...

17.2.18

Policy - Truth In Everything!

Now and then we see political activists (often from minor parties) calling for 'truth in political advertising' and similar concepts. This is seen as of benefit to both them and the general electorate because it will make it more difficult for the holders of power from the major parties to manipulate our understanding. But Me First! will take things further with our much-needed policy of Truth In Everything!

Yes it will apply to politics but it will also apply to other aspects of public life. Consider the following...

Truth In Commercial Advertising: You run a fish-and-chip shop and your window signage declares you make the 'best burgers in town'. Is this 'town' your locality, your municipality or your entire population centre? Be precise! How has 'best' been defined and tested? Were you awarded something by a recognized expert in burgers or did you survey the local population? Provide criteria and citations in small print on your window! Or is this just your opinion? Well then modify your sign to say 'we think we make the best burgers in town'. Or you could just add scare quotes to any and all of the words in your statement. If you cannot do this then we are calling your burger-related statement a pork pie! *

Truth In Architecture And Design: Have you installed shutters on your front windows for all to see? Do these shutters have hinges to allow them to close over your window? Are these shutters sufficiently wide to cover the entire window pane? Or are your shutters merely faux shutters intended to deceive? If so have you installed a small sign in your front yard stating that your shutters are purely decorative? You better have! The same will apply to facades that make a warehouse look like a fortress or finials that are only tacked onto your roof like some inverted chair leg. You have been warned!

Truth On The Web: Did you just share a meme without checking if it is accurate and comes from a respected source? Did you just say 'LOL' but cannot provide video evidence of you having just laughed out loud a moment ago? Was this spurious content only shared with your private circle or can it be seen by all-and-sundry? Be careful who you say things to or you will cop it baby!

This is how much truth matters to Me First! But how will we enforce this truth policy? Surely our law enforcement services are stretched as is! Our solution is this - defamation! Anyone who is exposed to and offended by a distortion of truth can sue. Nothing works better than having ones every word and deed scrutinized and policed by ones peers. The profit motive will drive us to make one another more truthful and result in a better society overall (while also enriching our party coffers). You are skeptical of this? Come on! Trust us! Would we lie to you?

* 'Pork Pie' is rhyming slang for 'lie'. You can use such figures-of-speech as long as you provide explanation.