The totally unique Me First! Party Structure and Mechanisms

The Me First! Party consists of these overlapping functional units:

The Me First! Executive – Me

The Me First! Membership – Me

Me First! State Divisions – As stated in ‘Why is Me First! different from all other political parties’ the Me First! Party is totally free from divisions of any kind whatsoever – even those based on interstate rivalry. Most interstate rivalry in Australia is fostered by an interest in sports like Australian Rules and the Membership has never had any interest in these sports so cannot see any need for state divisions in Me First!.

Me First! Branches – At any one time there is always one Me First! branch in existence depending on the current location of the membership. So for instance if the Membership is on the 9:00 am Glen Waverley train from Flinders Street Station then there is a Melbourne Branch at 9:00 am, a Glen Iris Branch at 9:15 am, and a Glen Waverley Branch at 9:35 am. Depending on personal circumstances these branches can be very effective campaigning units for the Me First! Party. On the other hand they can spend too much time just whinging.

The Me Generation (Youth Wing of the Me First! Party) – The Membership is now in its 30s but as they say “the 30s are the new 20s”. As such Me First! has its own youth wing - The Me Generation – which exists to keep the party young and fresh. The Me Generation can sometimes be seen at inner-suburban live music venues, outer-suburban housewarmings, and even rural camp-sites getting some R ‘n’ R.

Me Sexy (The Gender and Sexuality Issue Group of the Me First! Party) – To be perfectly honest this particular body within the Me First! Party has been dormant for some time now. However participation is open to both the membership and supporters of the Me First! Party so that may change at any time.

Me Too (The Me First! Party Supporters Network) – Me Too is for anyone who wants to further the political objectives of the Me First! Party but who cannot become a member because they are not me. Despite its total lack of political power it is this Supporters Network that plays a key role in the growing success of the Me First! Party.

Me Thinks (The Me First! ‘Think Tank’) – Every political party needs an associated public policy development organization or ‘think tank’ to recommend policy to it and promote public acceptance of that policy. Me Thinks gets grants from the government and spends it on the coffee needed to run policy-drafting sessions. It is important that Me Thinks works in isolation from the wider community to ensure that policy is free from such pesky considerations as practicality or popularity.

Feet First! (The NEW Me First! Pedestrian Representative Body) - In seeking a constituency Me First! have identified pedestrians as an under-represented demographic that we can hopefully take advantage of help. Just say "We were here first so put our Feet First!"

Me First! Funding Strategy – Me First! and Me Too will be funded by any and all methods deemed useful. The most innovative of these funding methods shall be that of a ‘Tontine’: Every Me Too participant can contribute to a fund which will be utilized to fund Me First! campaigns. However every political party also has to prepare for the possibility of its demise and the disposal of its funds. Whatever is left of the fund at the cessation of party operations will be won in its entirety by the last surviving registered participant. This tontine will provide participants with incentive to stay with Me First! till the bitter end in the hope that they will be the last living participant and can win a bloody fortune from the cold ashes of an extinct party.

International Links: The Protista – It is normal for political parties to foster links with like-minded sibling parties worldwide. We made overtures to libertarians but even they found us too annoying. So Me First! has combed the world to find truly like-minded organizations and so far has succeeded in finding one other: The Protista. The Protista is a one-member liberation front in Latin America dedicated to freeing itself from the confines of its own limited political assumptions. Together Me First! and The Protista are in the process of establishing the Egotist International but are experiencing differences over implementation issues.